Charmed! If you can still call it that
by alexywill22
Summary: Charmed gets Revamp! With the return of Prue and new writer! It's like before but better! Oh just read and review!
1. The Prodigal Sister Returns!

A/N: It's Back! Yes I brought it back! Note: This is not going to pick up where I left off, this will be a new beginning, but a little more tone down. Still the same concept though. Charmed, how it would be with the return of Shannen, and me calling the shots! I also star too! Woo!

Disclaimer: I own nothing Charmed related! Nothing! Everything here does not belong to me! I own nothing! please don't sue! Cause you'll get nothing! NOTHING!

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that...

Episode 1: The prodigal sister returns! (part 1)

Teaser:

(Fade in: Int. Charmed set. The cast stands ready to shoot. Shannen and Holly are whispering in a corner. Alyssa comes in and watches.)

ALYSSA: What are you guys doing?

SHANNEN: Nothing!

HOLLY: Not talking here!

(Alyssa gives them a scornful look.)

ALYSSA: Don't make me talk to Kern so he fires your ass again.

BRIAN: Guys! The camera's on.

(They all look rightly embarrass and get into character.)

PHOEBE: Oh my God! Prue! You're back!

PRUE: Well duh!

BRIAN: That's not what the scripts says...

PRUE: Shut up, you whiny ass, prissy, wannabe cool but isn't excuse for a man!

PIPER: That was harsh.

PHOEBE: Indeed.

(Rose walks into scene.)

ROSE: OK, let's shoot this.

HOLLY: (Whispering.) We're shooting already.

ROSE: We are? Damn it.

PAIGE: What's going on guys? (Eyeing Prue) Who's the hot chick?

HOLLY: Oh, who wrote that?

ALEX: (Off screen.) I did. I though it you be funny.

PRUE: Well this scene is officially ruin. And it was my big comeback!

ALEX: (Off screen.) Credits!

(Opening credits roll. "How soon is now" plays. Fade in: Int. Attic. Piper, Phoebe and Paige are looking in the Book of Shadows.)

PIPER: There has to be a way to change it back!

PHOEBE: There's nothing in the Book.

PAIGE: We can't give up! We just can't!

(Dramatic music plays. Leo walks in.)

LEO: Guys, I think you're going to have to face it. Prue's here to stay. For good.

(Piper puts her head down, tears running from her eyes.)

PIPER: No!

PHOEBE: Piper, calm down.

(Then a demon walks in.)

DEMON: (Greeting.) Charmed ones.

(Piper walks and hugs him.)

PIPER: Baby!

LEO: WHAT!

ROSE: Look who got a new love interest.

PHOEBE: I'm the demon dater here!

(Piper and the demon exit. Brian turns to the camera.)

BRIAN: What the hell was that about?

ALEX: (Off screen.) Sorry.

ROSE: Alex, can you give me a love interest? I mean, Piper's getting one and she's married.

ALYSSA: Guys, the show...

ROSE: Whatever.

(Shannen blinks in.)

ALYSSA: Wait a sec! Prue doesn't blink!

SHANNEN: I'm not Prue, I'm Shannen.

ALEX: (off screen.) Can we get back to what the script actually says?

PRUE: Well now let's see demons kick our ass now that we have the power of four on our side.

(They all high five. It's very childish really. Then Zankou flames in.)

ZANKOU: Can I borrow a cup of sugar?

(Paige TK-orbs some sugar. Zankou leaves.)

PHOEBE: That was random.

PAIGE: It was.

PRUE: Hmmm.

PHOEBE: What Prue?

PRUE: I just realized that I hardly got any screen time.

ALYSSA: So...?

PRUE: Just saying...

(Leo suddenly faints.)

PAIGE: Leo!

(They all rush to his side.)

PHOEBE: Leo, wake up!

(Prue takes his pulse.)

PRUE: Guys... I think he's dead...

(Cue dramatic music. Fade to black.)

To be continued...


	2. Not without My Leo!

A/N: Thanks for the feedback, here's the next part of the episode that didn't aired cause I thought I put it in but I didn't... yeah me dumb.

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that...

Episode 2: Not without my Leo! (part 2)

Recap:

(Fade in: Int. Kitchen. Piper's looking at the camera.)

Piper: Hey hoes. So I'm being force to do the recap, even though you all could just go and read the first one, but whatever. So, Prue came back and Leo may be dead now. It's all spooky. Well go on and watch the episode.

(Roll credits. Fade in: Attic. Prue is crying on Leo's chest. Paige and Phoebe look on. Well, actually they're talking about what to do.)

PHOEBE: Trust me, it's not my first. All we have to do is get rid of the body.

PAIGE: Like he Feds aren't suspicious enough.

PRUE: Leo! My one true love!

PHOEBE: Prue, he wasn't your husband.

PRUE: (Standing up.) Well someone has to cry for him. And I don't see Piper anywhere.

(Cut to: Piper's bedroom. We see that there's something or someone on the bed under the sheets. Whatever it is, it's doing something hump-y.)

VOICE UNDER THE SHEETS 1: Oh yeah, oh yeah!

VOICE UNDER THE SHEETS 2: YES! YES! YES!

(Piper enters and blows the bed with them in it up. Now will never know who they were. Oh the shame.)

PIPER: I got to get a new bed.

(Cole shimmers in.)

COLE: Hello, love.

PIPER: It was about time you got here.

(They hugged and make out. Alyssa storms in.)

ALYSSA: What the fuck? Why is Piper getting all the action?

ALEX: (Off screen.) It's in her contract.

ALYSSA: Well... then... I quit!

(She storms off the set. Julian and Holly look on.)

HOLLY: Should we go after her?

ALEX: (Off screen.) Um... I'll be back. Change scene!

(Cut back to the attic. Rose and Brian are talking. Shannen is picking her nose.)

BRIAN: Yeah, many don't remember, but I did do the Return to the Blue Lagoon.

ROSE: Wow, how nude did you go?

BRIAN: Well...

SHANNEN: Holy shit! We're taping!

(They all resumed 'acting'.)

PAIGE: Oh Leo... you were such a great whitelighter.

PRUE: But a sucky Elder.

PAIGE: But that's mostly cause Elders suck in general.

PRUE: True.

LEO: Yeah. That's so true.

ROSE: You're supposed to be dead.

BRIAN: Sorry.

(Leo goes completely limp. Prue seems to suddenly think in something. She starts to drag Leo's body out of the attic.)

PAIGE: What are you doing?

PRUE: Um... you'll see.

(She exits with Leo's body. Paige stands alone.)

PAIGE: Well, this sucks.

(She taps her foot and folds her arms. Dan shimmers in.)

DAN: Yo.

PAIGE: You are...?

DAN: I'm Piper's true love.

PAIGE: Yet another love for Piper.

DAN: You ok?

(Paige jumps him and starts to make out with him. Um... yeah. Cut to the living room. Piper is watching cartoons.)

PIPER: (Singing along.) Fighting crime, trying to save the world, here they come just in time, the Powerpuff girls!

(Prue walks down the stairs and gets a pair of handcuffs from the coat closet. Piper turns to see.)

PIPER: Watcha doing?

PRUE: (shifty.) Nothing. Just chilling.

PIPER: Wanna watch Beverly Hills 90210 with me?

PRUE: Pre or post Brenda?

PIPER: Pre.

PRUE: Sure!

(They both sit. The show plays on TV. We watch with them.)

BRENDA: Me! ME! MEEEEEEEE!

(We cut back to the girls.)

PRUE: She's such a roll model.

(Piper rolls her eyes.)

End.


	3. Who Ate The Last Cookie?

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. And I would never say Shannen's a bitch... or would I? Whatever, you're in for a double feature! Two episodes for you! Means two reviews for me! That's an order!

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that...

Episode 3: Who ate the last cookie?

Teaser:

(The camera remains black, but we hear talking.)

HOLLY: (Off screen.) So she's not coming back?

BRIAN: (Off screen.) It doesn't look like it.

(The lights turn on. Holly and Brian cover their eyes. Shannen steps in.)

SHANNEN: Good morning!

HOLLY: Guess you didn't hear about Alyssa.

SHANNE: (Smiling.) Oh I heard.

ROSE: (Off screen.) Action!

HOLLY: What the hell?

ROSE: I'm filling for Alex. Now let's shoot this!

(Roll credits. Fade in: Dining room. Prue and Piper are glaring at each other from opposite ends of the table.)

PIPER: I know what you did, Prue!

PRUE: So?

PIPER: You will pay, bitch!

PRUE: Listen, it's not what you think.

PIPER: You were always so desperate to want my things! But you cross the line!

(Piper gets a knife out of her... hair and throws at Prue. Prue TK's it to the next room. A cat screeches.)

PRUE: Damn it! I killed Kit.

(Prue looks back to where Piper... was. Cause she's not there anymore.)

PRUE: Piper?

(Cut to: Underworld. Two nameless demons are just standing around. Cole walks in.)

COLE: Demon 1! Demon 2!

DEMON 1: Cole! My man!

DEMON 2: Whassuuuuuuuuuup!

COLE: Whassuuuuuuuuuup!

DEMON 1: Whassuuuuuuuuuup!

DEMON 2: Hey let me call 3.

(He does so.)

DEMON 3: (From the phone.) Hello?

DEMON 2: Whassuuuuuuuuuup!

COLE: Whassuuuuuuuuuup!

DEMON 1: Whassuuuuuuuuuup!

DEMON 3: (From the phone.) Whassuuuuuuuuuup!

ALEX: (Off screen.) What the hell is this?

ROSE: (Off screen.) Prue's scene was boring me. Plus, I love this bit.

(Scuffling sounds are heard, then the sound of smacking on a head followed by a thud.)

ALEX: (Off screen.) Let's return to the Manor. Oh and someone get Rose to the Hospital.

(Cut to: Living room. Prue lies in a puddle of blood on the floor. Piper is painting her nails. Leo walks in. He appears to be dazed.)

PIPER: Hey, honey.

LEO: Where was I?

PIPER: You were gone? Huh. Go figure.

(Leo looks at her oddly. Phoebe walks in and looks out the window.)

PHOEBE: Ooh, ugly naked guy is washing his car!

PIPER: Alex!

ALEX: (Off screen.) What? We needed a Phoebe!

PIPER: But she's not even a witch!

ALEX: (Off screen.) She's new age-y!

(Piper blows Phoebe up.)

ALEX: (Off screen.) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Do you know how much she was worth? The "Friends" people are going to kill me!

(Paige walks in.)

PAIGE: Piper, Piper!

PIPER: What?

PAIGE: Who ate the last cookie?

PIPER: Ok, that's it!

(Piper beats on Paige and stalks away.)

ALEX: (Off screen.) Holly!

HOLLY: (Off screen.): This is stupid! For fucks sakes, she just said the tittle of the episode!

PAIGE: Well it was the line! Sue me!

(Prue gets back up.)

PRUE: Ow... what happened?

LEO: Prue!

(Leo runs away scared. Wonder what she did to him.)

PRUE: Damn, he was alive.

(Piper returns to scene.)

PRUE: Why did you beat me to a bloody pulp, Piper?

PIPER: You ate my last oreo cookie. That's just wrong.

(All laugh. Ending music plays. Fade to black.)

SHANNEN: (Off screen.) One more crappy episode done.

ALEX: (Off screen.) We're still rolling.

SHANNEN: (Off screen.) Shit.

End.


	4. Didn't We Do This Before?

A/N: You better not be reading this without reviewing the other one...

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that...

Episode 4: Didn't we do this before?

Teaser:

(Int. Attic. Piper, Prue and Leo are looking through the Book of Shadows.)

PRUE: I'm telling you I saw the spell here!

LEO: Prue, we all know Grams was crazy at times, but not even she was crazy enough to do a spell to bring Phoebe back.

PIPER: Can I ask why we're bothering with this? We have the power of three. We don't need another sister.

LEO: No! That's in "Charmed". This is "Charmed! If you can still call it that..." the base of the show is having the four sisters.

PIPER: Ah here's a spell. (Reading.) "Come lost sibling, I summon you now, return to the manor before I have cow?" (To Prue) Who the fuck wrote this?

(In a display of lights a woman appears in the room.)

SHANNEN: Tiffany Amber Thiesen!

(Roll credits. Alyssa has been removed from them, and Tiffany has been added. Also added, Tom Welling. Not sure why. Fade in: Shannen is throwing a fit.)

SHANNEN: Is this supposed to be some sort of sick joke?

ALEX: (Off screen.) Listen, she's here to replace Alyssa, not you.

SHANNEN: But she did replace me!

TIFFANY: Are you ever going to let that go?

ALEX: (Off screen.) The shooting has begun! We'll talk later. Action!

(Leo and Piper look on as Prue walks to the woman.)

PRUE: And you are?

PRECIOUS: Precious. Precious Halliwell. You guys know me as the former Source Of All Evil.

PIPER: Wait a sec. Alex you did this before!

ALEX: (Off screen.) I don't know what you're talking about...

PIPER: The first time you started this crappy thing! Then you just kept bringing sisters in!

LEO: I remember! There was, Precious, and Paris, and Pureness, and Patience, and Pepper-

ALEX: (Off screen.) Guys, that was a long time ago. Hardly anyone remembers, and no one will notice. Now can we please do this?

PIPER: (Not really caring.) Oh my God, we got another sister.

LEO: This is unbelievable

PIPER: Not really. Our mother was a dirty ho.

(Patty fades in.)

PATTY: I resent that!

PIPER: Well, you were. Plus, Precious father is Satan.

ALEX: (Off screen.) Piper, you're not supposed to know that yet!

PIPER: I'm not going to waste my time on old scenes, this show is crappy enough. Precious is mom's first kid. She gave her up to Satan cause if would've been weird for her to fight her own father. She has the same power as Prue and can shimmer and orb for reasons unknown. There, now everyone knows her past. Now if you excuse me, I have babies to feed.

(Piper exits. Leo gives everyone an apologetic smile and follows. Patty fades out. Precious and Prue stand in awkward silence. Let's make it more awkward! Paige orbs in.)

PAIGE: Wow, tense much?

PRECIOUS: She just feels threaten that we're always way better characters than her.

PRUE: That's it!

(Prue TK's them to the wall. She then astral-projects and two Prues stand to fight. Paige and Precious stand back up.)

PRECIOUS: Let's kick her ass!

PAIGE: Yeah! Old expensive and irreplaceable lamp!

(Paige TK-orbs said lamp on Prue's head. Precious kicks Astral-Prue in the face. both Prues stumble and bump into each other collapsing on the floor. Precious and Paige high-five and exit. Astral-Prue fades out.)

PRUE: Ow.

(Cut to: Kitchen. Everyone's eating pancakes.)

PIPER: Hmmm, pancakes.

PAIGE: Indeed.

LEO: You know, I wonder what did happened to Phoebe.

ALEX: (off screen.) Brian!

BRIAN: What? The audience will wonder!

ALEX: (Off screen.) Not if we ignore the problem. Remember how you guys face out any memories of Prue in Charmed? Well, we're going to do that here!

HOLLY: He's just trying to date her again.

ROSE: Ew! Dude!

BRIAN: Holly! You said you wouldn't tell people!

HOLLY: Cry me a river, Krause!

TIFFANY: And I thought Tori Spelling was hard to work with...

ALEX: (Off screen.) Guys! For Piper's sake! I wanted to do a tender family scene!

(The cast mumbles and resumed their characters. Tom Welling walks in shirtless. All drool.)

TOM: I still don't understand what my character is supposed to do.

ALEX: (off screen.) Tom, Tom, Tom, you keep doing what you do best and leave the writing to me, ok?

(Zankou flames in.)

ZANKOU: Hi! Just stopped by to tell you that from now until the season finale I'll try and steal the Book from you guys.

PAIGE: Wouldn't it have been better for you to NOT tell us?

ZANKOU: Um... look! Alyssa Milano!

(All turn to see. Zankou flames out.)

PIPER: Damn! The old Alyssa's behind you trick!

PRECIOUS: Well it looks like we're going to have to guard the book.

PIPER: Whatever...

LEO: Where's Prue?

PAIGE: Who cares?

LEO: Good point.

PIPER: Can we just end this waste of an episode already.

ALEX: (Off screen.) Well, if no one has anything else to add-

ALL: NO!

ALEX: (Off screen.) Fine. Testy much?

(Fade to black.)

End.


	5. She's Back!

A/N: I updated. Not much else to say. Oh yeah! Alyssa somehow is back... wait till the cast finds out... oooh.

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that...

Episode 5: She's back!

Teaser:

(Int. Attic. The cast is not ready... what shocker. Holly and Rose are talking.)

HOLLY: So what did you REALLY see in Marilyn Manson?

ROSE: Well, if you really want to know, he-

ALEX: (Off screen.) Guys? The show?

BRIAN: (Obviously just now giving the script a glance.) Alex! You're supposed to give a countdown!

ALEX: (Off screen.) I did. You were to busy text messaging Julian to notice!

BRIAN: Well, he hardly comes around here, we're working in both Charmed and this show, why can't he do the same?

ALEX: (Off screen.) Brian, get it through your head, Julian is not your friend! He has stated many times that he hates you.

BRIAN: (Tearing up.) No he doesn't...

HOLLY: And here comes the water works.

BRIAN: (suddenly angry.) You know, I had just about enough of your lip, Comps!

HOLLY: What are you going to do about it bitch?

ALEX: (Off screen.) Action!

PIPER: Leo, I love you so much.

LEO: You're my soul mate, Piper.

(They kiss. So much love. So much irony. Paige gags.)

PAIGE: What are we doing here again?

PIPER: We're guarding the Book.

PAIGE: Oh.

(Pause.)

PAIGE: Where is the Book?

(Cue cryptic music.)

ALEX: (Off screen.) Beautiful! Roll credits!

(Roll credits. Alyssa's back on them! Fade in: Phoebe's room. Prue is going through Phoebe's closet. Phoebe walks in.)

PHOEBE: Hey, Prue.

PRUE: Hey, Phoebe. (-Does a double take-) Wait a sec! What the hell are you doing here? Alex!

ALEX: (Off screen.) We'll speak after the show.

PRUE: Precious!

(Precious shimmers in.)

PRECIOUS: Yo.

PRUE: Kill Phoebe!

PRECIOUS: Why?

PRUE: You're the Source, aren't you?

PRECIOUS: Yeah, but why am I going to kill my own sister?

PRUE: Um, you killed me and tried to kill them afterwards.

PRECIOUS: Details, details.

PHOEBE: Could you guys get out of my room?

BOTH: Shut up!

(Paige orbs in.)

PHOEBE: Do people just forget how to walk in this house?

PAIGE: GUYS! The Book is missing!

(Cue dramatic music. Prue slaps Phoebe.)

PHOEBE: Ow.

PRUE: What do you mean "missing"?

PAIGE: What else could "missing" mean?

PRECIOUS: You guys are such asses.

(She flames out. Yep. Precious flames too.)

PRUE: To the attic!

(Cut to: Attic. Piper and Leo are making out. The sisters orb in.)

PIPER: (Pushing Leo off.) Guys! Knock first or something!

PAIGE: Oh would you guys get a room already.

PRUE: NO! No more with the sex! We have to find the Book! Zankou's probably behind this.

PIPER: What? Oh, we found the Book. It was behind the couch.

PHOEBE: Oh, yeah. I left it there.

(Pause.)

PIPER: When did she comeback?

PHOEBE: Piper, I'm right here.

PIPER: (Ignoring Phoebe.) That's nice, Phoebe. Prue, answer my question.

PRUE: How should I know?

PIPER: Well all the bad stuff happens when you're around!

(Prue cries. Paige sighs.)

PAIGE: Dan!

(Dan shimmers in.)

DAN: Yes, love?

PAIGE: Get me out of here.

(Dan and Paige shimmer/orb out.)

PIPER: (Fuming.) She's dating Dan?

LEO: Isn't anyone going to ever wonder why Dan can shimmer?

PRUE: Shut up, Leo!

PHOEBE: Is great to be back.

(Fade to black. Ending music.)

End.


	6. Don't you just love previously ons?

A/N: ok, I know, where the hell was I? would you nbbelieve coma? Ok, no. Fine, I've been bad, but hey life gets in the way, you know if it were up to me I would just write fanfic but it's not up to me, it's up to... I don't know... um anyway, I'll update all my others this next week and I'm also starting yet another fic... I'm so going to get backed up. Review so I see you care!

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that…

Episode 6: Don't you just love previously ons?

PRUE: (Off Screen.) Previously on Charmed! If you can still call it that…

(Fade in: Manor living room. Piper and Leo are fighting ninjas!)

PIPER: (blowing a ninja up) Leo, watch out!

(Leo gets stabbed with a sword. Cut to: Hospital bed. Prue's lays in a coma. Paige and Andy are there.)

PAIGE: Face it, she's never going to wake up!

(Andy slaps Paige. Cut to: Piper's bedroom. Piper walks in on Leo in bed with Phoebe!)

LEO: Piper! Is not what it looks like!

(Cut to: Attic. Patty is on the floor in a pile of blood. Jack Sheridan stares in horror.)

JACK: Who did this to you!

GRAMS: You did, dumbass!

(Cut to: Hell. Paige and Prue are fighting each other with knifes.)

PAIGE: Tell me where it is!

PRUE: Never!

(Paige pushes Prue and she falls in a crater. Cut to: Bathroom. Cole is wearing a pink thong. Prue walks in.)

PRUE: Oh my GOD!

(Cut to: Magic School. Paige is disabling a bomb.)

PAIGE: What do you mean cut the blue wire! They're all blue!

(Cut to: Interrogation room. Prue and Darryl are interrogating Phoebe. Prue slaps Phoebe hard.)

PRUE: Tell us who you're working for!

PHOEBE: Ok, ok. I work for-

(Cut to: Golden Gate Bridge. Wyatt and Chris argue.)

CHRIS: You can't play god!

WYATT: I am God!

(Holly Marie Combs flames in.)

HOLLY: Correction! I'm GOD!

(She shoots lightning at Wyatt. Cut to: Courtroom. The judge is about to delivered his sentence.)

JUDGE: Phoebe Halliwell, I hereby sentence you to shave your whole head to pay for the atrocious crimes against your hair.

PHOEBE: I want to appeal!

(Cut to: Piper's bedroom. Piper walks in on Leo in bed with Prue!)

LEO: Piper! Is not what it looks like!

(Cut to: Police department. Darryl is holding up Zankou.)

ZANKOU: You don't want to shoot me!

DARRYL: Why the hell not?

ZANKOU: Cause I'm your father!

(Cut to the attic. The charmed ones are making potions. The window opens and Dawson enters.)

DAWSON: Oops! Wrong set!

PRUE: Isn't your show like over?

DAWSON: Good point.

(Cut to: Volcano. Paige is about to fall and is holding on with one hand. Prue kneels on the edge.)

PAIGE: Give me your hand!

PRUE: Give me the ring!

(Cut to: Piper's bedroom. Piper walks in on Leo in bed with Cole!)

LEO: Piper! Is not what it looks like!

(Cut to: Elder land. Piper and Prue are throwing potions at Elders and killing them all off.)

ODIN: Stop this insanity!

PIPER: Go to hell!

(Piper blows his head off. Cut to: Dan's house. He's eating cereal.)

DAN: I just love my cocoa pops!

(He's shot dead. Leo appears from the bushes, blowing smoke from a shotgun. Cut to: foyer. Piper answers the door. It's the mailman.)

MAILMAN: Here's your mail.

PIPER: Thank you!

(Cut to: Piper's bedroom. Leo walks in on Piper in bed with Tom Welling.)

PIPER: Leo! It's totally what it looks like, you ass!

(Cut to: Helicopter. Leo falls out and the helicopter explodes. Cut to: Beach. Prue chases Phoebe with a gun.)

PRUE: You will not get away again!

PHOEBE: Bite me!

(Phoebe crashes in to Jack. They both stumble and fall off a cliff. Cut to: Lab. Piper sees through her microscope.)

PIPER: At this rate the virus will contaminate the entire state in a matter of seconds!

(Cut to the manor living room. The sisters are panicking.)

PRUE: We're not going to make it!

PAIGE: It's coming!

PHOEBE: I love you guys!

PIPER: God helps us all!

(The manor suddenly blows up. Fade to black.)

PRUE: (Off screen.) And now Tonight's Charmed if you can still call it that…

(Fade in: The four charmed ones sit in the living room watching TV.)

PIPER: Yesterday was weird.

PRUE: Yep it was.

PAIGE: Strange.

PHOEBE: And busy.

PIPER: Oh well.

(Fade to black.)

End.


	7. That ratings episode!

A/N: Here's one more cause I'm nice. Review individually.

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that…

Episode 7: That ratings episode!

Fade in:

(Int. Attic. Shannen and Alyssa are bitching, as usual.)

ALEX: (Off screen.) I don't see what the problem is.

SHANNEN: You want us to make out!

ALEX: (Off Screen.) So…?

SHANNEN: We're sisters for fuck sakes!

ALEX: (Off Screen.) I know that you twit, that's why the script says Alyssa and Shannen are making out, not Phoebe and Prue. I'm not a pervert.

SHANNEN: Still, I'm not going where haft of Hollywood has been infected.

ALYSSA: Excuse me! At least my ex's don't have a sex video with Paris Hilton!

SHANNEN: Oh you do not want to go there, bitch!

ALEX: (Off Screen.) Guys, I'm sorry to put you in this position, but we need the ratings. I took a little time off and I'm worried people aren't watching this anymore. And everyone loves lesbian action. You know all about that Pheebs.

ALYSSA: Yeah, I know. I mean, shut up!

ALEX: (Off Screen.) Let's just start this. If it gets uncomfortable, we'll stop.

(Cut to credits. Fade in: Living room. Piper and Paige are hanging.)

PAIGE: Thanks for hanging with me.

PIPER: Oh no problem. (Under her breath.) I couldn't find something else to do.

PAIGE: I mean, ever since Dan died by that mysterious shooter I'm all conflicted and lonely. I really need to set my life straight.

PIPER: Speaking of Straight, do you know who no longer is?

PAIGE: Leo?

PIPER: No! God no! Why do people keep asking if he's gay?

PAIGE: The fact that he has sex with Cole from time to time may have a tad to do with it.

PIPER: Oh, but that's Cole. Not even GOD could resist Cole.

PAIGE: hmmm, Holly/Cole action. That's hot.

PIPER: Indeed. But, getting back to what I was saying, Shannen Doherty has gone gay.

PAIGE: (Snapping fingers.) Say what?

PIPER: Yep. She's gayer than gay. She's the gayest woman in the whole gay town.

PAIGE: So who is she dating?

(Cut to: Magic school. Cole and Phoebe are there.)

PHOEBE: I know your secret.

COLE: Prue told you, huh?

PHOEBE: Why couldn't you just be honest with me?

COLE: Is not easy for a man to admit he likes to wear pink thongs.

PHEOBE: Cole, you're not a man, you're an evil disgusting demon. (She moans.) Let's have sex!

(Drake walks in.)

DRAKE: I'm back.

PHOEBE: Drake! My love!

COLE: What about me!

PHOEBE: I'm hot for you both equally.

DRAKE: Cool. So, orgy anyone?

ALEX: (Off screen.) Cut!

PHOEBE: What? It was just getting to the really good part!

ALEX: You go prepare for your big make out scene. I'll put someone that actually deserves to be with these to guys at once.

(Alyssa exits, grunting. Brian walks in.)

ALEX: Ok, boys, let's make this hot. Action!

DRAKE: Cool. So, orgy anyone?

LEO: Yes please!

COLE: I'm in!

ALEX: Excellent. Cue holly!

(Piper walks in with a whip.)

PIPER: Who's been a bad boy?

ROSE: Alex, this is sick.

ALEX: Hey, whatever keeps the ratings up. Now let's move to the big lesbian kiss scene!

(Cut to: Piper's bedroom. Shannen and Alyssa sit on the bed.)

SHANNEN: (forced.) Oh, Alyssa, you have opened my eyes to hot lesbian sex.

ALYSSA: Well I'm very sexual.

SHANNEN: I need your sweep taste on my-I'm so not saying this!

ALEX: Damn it, Prue! It was a good shot!

SHANNEN: I'm not kissing her!

ALYSSA: Ditto!

ALEX: Fine. Would you settle for a mud fight?

SHANNEN: Can I have weapon?

ALEX: Of course.

ALYSSA: Can I?

ALEX: No.

(A mud bath appears in the middle of the room. Also, a bunch of middle age old men. Prue and Phoebe get in the tub. Prue gets a chainsaw.)

PRUE: Die, whore, die!

Old man: Sexy!

(Cut to: P3. Paige is at the bar getting hammered. The Black Eyed Peas are playing in the background.)

WILL I. AM: What you going to do with all that junk? All that junk inside your trunk?

FERGIE: I'm going, going to get you drunk. Get you love drunk of my hump.

PAIGE: They're playing our song… Oh, Dan.

(Andy sits next to her.)

ANDY: There, there.

PAIGE: Thanks for being here, Andy.

ANDY: No problem. So, when's Prue coming?

PAIGE: She's not.

ANDY: Oh. (Getting up.) Well, I have to get up early tomorrow…

PAIGE: You're dead.

ANDY: Doesn't mean I don't have a life.

(The laugh track plays. Paige and Andy look around confuse.)

PAIGE: Where did that come from?

ANDY: Magic?

(Paige slaps Andy. Fade to black.)

End.


	8. She had enough part 1

A/N: I'm baaaaaack! Where was I? Um... well IO was walking on the street one day and I bumped into Shannen doherty and long story short I was rescueed from her basement last night. Woo me! I'll try and see what I can update and hopefully ppl are still reading my stuff. Well, I'm starting new stuff too, but not today. well, review this, cuase I'm taking the whole thing to the old school charmed days, you'll see!

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that…

Episode 8: She had enough! (Part 1)

(Fade in: Int. Living room. The four sisters are playing Monopoly. And if you have siblings, you know it's not going well.)

PRUE: What do you mean you don't have the money? (She raises her hand at Phoebe.) Pay up or I'll kill you!

PHOEBE: All I got are my two properties! My money ran out when I went to Paige's stupid hotel.

PAIGE: Hey, it's not my fault you don't have luck with the dice.

PIPER: My turn!

(Piper throws the dice. Double sixes. She moves pass go and collects 200$. Piper uses it to buy three more properties.)

PIPER: I'm so kicking your capital asses!

PAIGE: Rub it in, why don't you.

PHOEBE: That's what she just did.

PAIGE: I know. It was an expression.

PHOEBE: A sex pressing?

PIPER: I get another turn according to this card and 500$.

PRUE: Oh you have got to be shitting me!

(In the background Zankou walked up the stairs, heading for the attic. Precious came in and saw him.)

PRECIOUS: Um, guys?

PRUE: How the hell did you get so good at this?

PIPER: Cause I rule.

PRECIOUS: Guys!

PAIGE: Here we go again…

PHOEBE: We're going somewhere?

PRUE: You know what, I had it! You do not rule!

(Gasp! Roll credits. Fade in: Right where we left.)

PAIGE: Did she just say what I think she said?

PHOEBE: I'm scared.

PIPER: What did you say!

PRUE: You heard me! You DON'T rule! In fact, you SUCK!

(Double gasp!)

ALEX: (Off screen.) Guys, let's all calm down here.

PIPER: I suck! I SUCK! Excuse me? I'm not the lame ass sister who died! I took care of the family and had two kids who are going to be hot enough to model, P3 is the most bitching club in San Francisco and I'm the only one of you guys that's married! I also and a way better leader of the Charmed ones and can blow anyone up! I rule!

FANS: (Off screen.) Hail Piper!

PRUE: It's always the death thing with you! Did you forget what a wimp you were back when I was alive! You coward stupid face!

PIPER: Well, at least I can take a hit! What's wrong with you? (Mocking baby voice.) Did the little wall cause irreversible brain damage? Poor little Prue can get hit by a little wooden wall?

PAIGE: That was harsh.

PRUE: Stay out of this pasty ho face!

PAIGE: Don't start with me, Halliwell.

PHOEBE: Guys don't fight!

PRECIOUS: Phoebe's right. Zankou-

PRUE: You know what, Piper? You are not God!

(Prue suddenly astral projects.)

ASTRAL PRUE: (Demon voice.) But I am.

(Astral Prue waves her hand and TK's her four sisters all around the room. Piper falls on the couch. Paige hits the coffee table in the corner. Precious hits the clock. Phoebe hits the collection of knifes that someone had placed for no reason there. A biker rides through the door and Astral Prue hops on his back.)

BIKER DOOD: Welcome back, baby.

ASTRAL PRUE: Let's leave this place.

PHOEBE: Prue, get your astral ass back here!

PAIGE: Hmm, déjà vu all over again.

(The ride off, pulling the table cloth with them, knocking down the wedding cake on the floor. The sisters get up and stare at each other confused.)

PRECIOUS: Where did that wedding cake come from?

(Leo enters with a big grim on his face.)

LEO: It took me 12 hours, but I finally made a replica of our wedding cake for our anniversary! (Off the girls looks.) What?

(Leo turns to see the mess that was formally known as his wedding cake. He falls on his knees and cries his puffy eyes out. What a drama queen. Close up of his poor broken hearted face. Piper looks at the door.)

PIPER: Paige, could you do that annoying spell you do to make our lives easier?

PAIGE: Let the object of objection-

ALEX: (Off screen.) Hold it! We're low on budget this week so you guys are going to have to cool it with your powers.

PHOEBE: But we have to stop Prue!

ALEX: (Off screen.) Yeah. Just do it old school charmed like. Without so many effects. Oh, and Paige, the orbing thing is expensive so you're blinking from now on.

PAIGE: Aw man.

PRECIOUS: Guys, can we focus here!

PIPER: I'm sorry Precious, did Prue destroying Leo's anniversary surprise for me and telling me that I suck interrupt you?

PRECIOUS: As a matter a fact, yes! Zankou was heading up the stairs!

PIPER: Well, you guys are three, take care of it! Cause if I remember correctly, I'm supposed to leave angrily and go get hammered at the club. See ya!

(Piper exits, stepping on Prue's body.)

PRECIOUS: I'll shimmer to the attic.

ALEX: (Off screen.) Blink! Cheaper!

PRECIOUS: But I don't know how to fucking blink!

PAIGE: Well, Valerie, you're going to have to learn since we got to stop Brenda before someone gets hurt!

(The ending music starts playing.)

PHOEBE: Guys! Guys!

PAIGE: What Phoebe?

(Fade to black.)

PHOEBE: (Off screen.) This is a cliffhanger!

PRECIOUS: (Off screen.) Shit.

To be continued…


	9. She had enough part 2

A/N: Um... yeah...

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that…

Episode 9: She had enough! (Part 2)

(Fade in: Ext. desert road. Astral Prue and her biker dood ride to look for some danger and whatnot.)

ASTRAL PRUE: Thank you for coming back biker dood.

BIKER DOOD: You're welcome. So, what do we do now? Cause havoc and stuff?

ASTRAL PRUE: You read my mind.

ALEX: (Off screen.) Guys, you're names are pretty long, so since the public already know you're astral Prue I'm just calling you Prue and you biker dood are going to be just dood.

DOOD: Cool!

PRUE: Bitching!

ALEX: (Off screen.) Now can one of you please do the recap?

BOTH: No!

(They ride off-screen. Bastard. Roll credits! Fade in: Bay Mirror. Paige and Precious are waiting for Phoebe in her office.)

PRECIOUS: Can you tell me what the hell are we doing here? Zankou just stole the book of shadows! He could use it to try and access the Nexus!

PAIGE: You worry too much.

PRECIOUS: Well, sorry. I'm trying to get use to being a "charmed one".

PAIGE: It is kind of annoying.

PRECIOUS: What did you do with your off time before?

PAIGE: Well, I was a painter…

(Flashback music begins to play-suddenly the sound of a record scratching.)

ALEX: (Off screen.) No flashbacks!

PAIGE: We can't even do freaking flashbacks!

PRECIOUS: What happen to the money in the budget?

ALEX: (Off screen.) Kern bought Alyssa presents.

PAIGE: Figures…

(Phoebe and Elise enter.)

PHOEBE: Ok, we're obviously dealing with an unstable elderly bitch so I brought Elise to help us out.

ELISE: Jeez, Phoebe, tell me how you really feel.

PRECIOUS: I still think we should look for Zankou first.

PAIGE: We can't stop Zankou by ourselves! We need Piper and Prue! Hello? Party of five?

PRECIOUS: I think you meant "power of five" and I think we don't need them. We're kick ass on our own. Right, Phoebe?

(Phoebe was flirting with the movie critic.)

PHOEBE: You got big hands…

MOVIE CRITIC: I'm gay.

PHOEBE: Me too! Let's make out!

(He leaves to find a sexual harassment form.)

ELISE: Look, if you really want my opinion, you're sister is most likely to do something crazy, but before she can do that she needs to get wasted. So you'll probably find her in the local biker bars around the city and outskirts. I could hook you up with a couple of party buddies of mine.

PAIGE: That's… that's actually very helpful.

ELISE: I'll make a few calls.

(She exits. Phoebe comes back in. Precious kicks the desk in frustration.)

PRECIOUS: Ow! Damn it!

PAIGE: Ok, I'll just orb-

PRECIOUS: Blink.

PAIGE: Oh, right… blink to magic school to check on what the students have found.

(She blinks out.)

PRECIOUS: I'll go to the underworld to see if I find what Zankou's next move is. You wait for Elise's info and then go get Piper to help you look for Prue.

PHOEBE: Ok.

PRECIOUS: And Phoebe, do not get distracted.

PHOEBE: Don't worry, I won't.

(Precious blinks out. Phoebe looks out her window. A man is walking all shifty like. Phoebe gets the goggles she uses to spy on the guy from the building down the street shower to look at the man better. The man is Cole. Phoebe is shocked. Elise walks in.)

ELISE: Here are the numbers you need-

PHOEBE: Sorry, Elise, but I just saw Cole! You know what that means…

ELISE: (Annoyed.) You'll drop everything you're supposed to do and make it all about you and Cole.

PHOEBE: DUH! Now, bye!

(She rushes out. Elise shakes her head.)

ELISE: Guess I'll have to rescue Prue myself!

(Cut to: Manor. Front steps. Leo is playing catch with Wyatt. Chris is in his crib by the door.)

LEO: With all of this spoiling you won't turn evil and take over the world. You'll just turn into a spoil brat.

WYATT: Da-da.

(He turns Leo into a goat. Wyatt jumps on Leo and rides him off to someplace. Chris is left on the steps. And you wonder why he felt rejected. Andy walks up.)

ANDY: Poor baby. Let's find you a nice foster family.

(Andy takes Chris. Cut to: P3. Gwen Stefani is playing in the background. Piper is dancing with Drake)

GWEN: Drive back, baby, do me fast in your car! I'm here waiting, CRASH! Into me real hard!

PIPER: Sounds like Phoebe in high school!

DRAKE: You're so funny. You're perfect.

PIPER: I am. To think Prue said I suck. Bitch.

DRAKE: Well, you most certainly rule my world.

PIPER: Thank you. Wanna go to the backroom?

(They smile and walk to it. Ok, time for the cliffhanger. Cut to: A cliff. Darryl is hanging with one hand to the edge.)

DARRYL: Help!

(Zankou blinks in.)

DARRYL: You!

ZANKOU: Son, join me.

DARRYL: I…

NARRATOR: (Off screen.) Will Darryl say yes? Will he say no? Will he fall? Will he discover his wife is cheating on him with Andy?

DARRYL: She what!

ALEX: (Off screen.) Find out next episode!

(Fade to a naked picture of Alyssa Milano. Shuffling sounds are heard. Fade to black.)

To be continued…


	10. She had enough part 3

A/N: Ok, I'm not putting off updating my other fics but since this one's already done I might as well post it already! The season finale will come soon, you may want to fill e in what you want for the second season on your reviews! That's right, season 2!

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that…

Episode10: She had enough! (Part3)

(Fade in: Attic. Grams is staring directly at the camera.)

GRAMS: Hey whores and male whores. I'm Penny "Grams" Halliwell. I'm here to do the recap… um… stuff… happened. The end.

ALEX: (Off screen.) What the hell was that?

GRAMS: I forgot to read that thing you gave me.

ALEX: (Off screen.) The script?

GRAMS: Yeah. That.

ALEX: (Off screen.) Oh Prue this.

(Roll credits. Brian has been removed and replaced with Billy the goat the III as Leo Wyatt. Fade in: Underworld. Buffy the vampire slayer and Precious are battling some demons. Buffy spin kicks one into a wall and slices another with a sword. Precious TK's one into another one and throws an atheme at one behind her back. Eventually they kill all of them.)

PRECIOUS: I thought we were never going to beat them.

BUFFY: But… now that they're dead we can't interrogate them.

PRECIOUS: I knew I forgot something. I must be spending too much time with Phoebe.

BUFFY: Well, we can look for more if you want…

PRECIOUS: It's ok. Thanks for your help.

(Precious blinks out. Buffy frowns.)

BUFFY: Now how the fuck am I suppose to get out of here?

(Cut to: Magic school. Paige is tongue-ing a student. That woman Elder whose name I never know orbs in.)

PAIGE: You can orb! We must've gotten our budget back!

ALEX: (Off screen.) No you didn't. She's paying for that effect from her salary.

LADY ELDER: What? Damn it!

ALEX: (Off screen.) Camera's rolling…

PAIGE: Man… my students have no luck finding anything on Zankou.

LADY ELDER: I have an idea! Maybe he's on line!

(She takes out a laptop from her robe. She turns it on and we zoom on the screen.)

ladyelderchick54: Hey

sexydemonvoice476: Hi 33333

ladyelderchick54: How r u?

sexydemonvoice476: Fine, u?

ladyelderchick54: kwel. So… watcha doing?

sexydemonvoice476: Reading if u can believe it.

ladyelderchick54: watcha reading?

sexydemonvoice476: the BOS

ladyelderchick54: brb

(We zoom out back to Magic school.)

LADY ELDER: He has the book!

PAIGE: You have Zankou on your buddy list?

LADY ELDER: Paige he's reading it!

PAIGE: Ok, ok, I'll call Phoebe.

(She grabs her cell and dials Phoebe's number.)

PHOEBE: (On the phone.) You have reach Phoebe's pink phone, I'm either not around or have the phone on vibrate for my own pleasure cause I'm always available, so leave a message after the beat-

PAIGE: (Hanging up.) Where could she be now?

(Cut to: San Francisco Street set. Cole is shifting around. Phoebe discreetly follows. She passes Wyatt riding Leo the goat. She doesn't notice. Cole finally reaches for a store and gets in. Phoebe looks at the store sign.)

PHOEBE: Jewelry store! He's getting me a ring and is going to propose!

(She paces letting it sink in. Andy walks up.)

ANDY: Hey, Phoebe.

PHOEBE: Hey. Aren't you supposed to be working with Sheila? Are you sleeping on the job?

ANDY: Under it, actually.

PHOEBE: I never got that.

ANDY: It's an old Prue joke about Leo.

PHOEBE: Speaking of that, Cole's going to propose!

ANDY: How did this turn about you and Cole?

PHOEBE: It's always about me and Cole.

ANDY: I was dead during those years so I don't-

PHOEBE: How did you come back? I mean, Prue's back cause Satan thought she was too evil for him and no one wanted her in heaven and the jerks in limbo decided that she be better with us and Cole's back cause he's Cole. But why are you back?

ANDY: I… faked my death 7 years ago.

(Pause.)

ANDY: Isn't that 'dum, dum, dum' music supposed to play now?

PHOEBE: Low budget.

ANDY: Oh. Ok.

PHOEBE: So you've been alive all these years? Why did you do it?

ANDY: Well, the reason is actually link to Paige. You see-

PHOEBE: Enough about that! I have to figure out what to wear since Cole's proposing! Woo!

(She levitates out. You can see the strings and the van that carries them. Cut to: Dive biker bar. Prue is playing TK-pool with some big ass biker.)

PRUE: 8 ball, corner pocket.

(She TK's the ball and it flies to the bar and breaks several glasses. Prue blushes slightly.)

PRUE: Put it on Dood's tab.

DOOD: Aw man…

PRUE: Enough of this! Let's go rob a jewelry store and get married!

BARTENDER: Didn't they do that episode in Season 4?

DRUNK GUY: Hush!

(Prue and Dood head out. A few minutes pass and Elise barges in.)

ELISE: Where's the whore!

BARTENDER: She only does guys, unless you want a man whore but I think he also only does guys…

ELISE: I mean Prue Halliwell.

BARTENDER: Oh. She just left. Something about stealing a ring and getting hitch.

ELISE: Oh no! I must stop the wedding!

PATTY: (Off screen.) Rutabaga.

(Elise turns to see Patty "The whore" Halliwell walk out of the whore room.)

ELISE: Who are you?

PATTY: A friend.

(Fade to black.)

To be continued…


	11. She had enough part 4

A/N: The last one before the big finale!

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that…

Episode 11: She had enough! (Part 4)

(Fade in: Luke's Diner. Lorelai and Rory are chatting it up.)

LORELAI: I didn't mean anything by it. It was just a comment.

RORY: You told him his hat was old. You know, how much Luke loves his baseball hats.

(Phoebe walks in and sits down with them.)

PHOEBE: So, guess what?

LORELAI: You're a perfect stranger and you still sat with us?

PHOEBE: Cole's going to propose!

RORY: Congratulation?

PHOEBE: This is like the biggest event of my life. But should I really marry him again?

LORELAI: If would help if we actually knew who you were.

PHOEBE: (Realizing.) This isn't my set.

(Roll Gilmore Girls credits. Wait! Roll normal credits. Fade in: basement. Zankou is doing the spell to absorb the Nexus. The black smoke starts to rise and enters his eyes and nose and whatnot. Suddenly Paige Astral projects in.)

PAIGE: Stop!

ZANKOU: How-

(She kicks him in the groin and then throws a potion at him. He turns to stone.)

PAIGE: Leave now I command you, as far away as Timbuktu.

(He disappears from the room.)

PAIGE: Ok, now the Nexus. I am light, I am one too strong to-

WOOGYMAN: No! Join me, Paige. I'll give you pretty powers.

PAIGE: Sorry, dude. (She takes out her badge.) I'm a whitelighter now. You're under arrest for trying to posses people.

(She cuffs the incorporeal entity. Cut to: Andy's office. Darryl walks in.)

DARRYL: Andy where were you earlier?

ANDY: I could ask you the same question.

(Andy throws an envelope to him. Darryl opens it to find a bunch of pictures of him with Zankou.)

ANDY: Is there something you want to say to me, Morris?

DARRYL: You do not want to go there.

(Ooh, so much drama. Let's lighten the mood. Piper walks in.)

PIPER: My husband and children are missing! You guys need to find them! Now!

ANDY: Piper, now is not the time for that.

(Piper blows up his desk.)

PIPER: I think I didn't make myself clear. I say jump you say how high, ok?

ANDY: Ok.

DARRYL: Yeah.

PIPER: Good. Now where are my boys?

(Andy and Darryl share a look.)

PIPER: Is there something I'm missing here?

ANDY: I gave Chris to social services.

PIPER: You WHAT!

ANDY: I thought you all died and he needed to be taken care of.

(Piper produced a knife and went to jumped on Andy. Darryl stopped her.)

DARRYL: Piper, calm down!

PIPER: I'm going to kill his Prue loving ass!

FEMALE VOICE: (Off screen.) Maybe I can help.

(They all turned to see Paris Halliwell (Shannon Elizabeth) standing at the door.)

PIPER: Paris! But you were dead!

PARIS: Well, sis, I'm back. And I have the solution to all this madness in this book. (She takes out a small black book.) And as long as nothing happens to me and this book, that contains the answer to all the questions everyone must be asking themselves, everything will be ok.

(Just then two tracker demons blink in and shoot Paris, killing her and stealing the book. They blink out.)

PIPER: Fuck.

DARRYL: Well, it can't get worse than this.

(Sheridan and the FBI burst in.)

SHERINDA: Care to explain why you three have a dead body of one of your sisters here?

(Cut to: Morgue. Precious is there with the coroner.)

CORONER: They found her like this at the manor. I called you as soon as she got here.

PRECIOUS: Ok. Show me the body.

(They walk to a table and the coroner lifts up the blanket. Precious stares in disbelief.)

PRECIOUS: It's… it's… (Looking at the camera.) Did you really think we were going to tell you?

(Cut to: Elise's car. She and Patty are riding in it.)

ELISE: So you want to explain to me that again so the viewers know what is going on?

PATTY: Prue can marry any guy she wants, but if astral Prue gets married she becomes a real person and unlike Prue her evil will spread to the world. But we can't left the elders find out that she's getting married or they could butt in and no one likes the elders butting in. so we're calling it "rutabaga" till we can stop her.

ELISE: Right. So… what are Elders and what do you mean by astral Prue?

PATTY: Um… I'll explain later. Let's just focus on finding Prue.

ELISE: Sure.

(Pause.)

PATTY: Wanna screw this and go all Thelma and Louise?

ELISE: Do I!

(They get off course. Cut to: Newport Beach. Phoebe is talking with Ryan and Marissa.)

PHOEBE: So now he's going to propose again.

RYAN: Do we know you?

PHOEBE: This isn't my set again? Stupid map!

(Fade to black.)

To be continued…


	12. She had enough part 5

A/N: The season finale is here! And please note that the seasons for these things will be 12 eps and though I'm not sure of a season three I already started on season two. and I hope you all will ove it! Warning, this ep contains a hell of a lot of cliffhangers... and some are even for this show lol Review and if you can read too.

Title: Charmed! If you can still call it that…

Episode 12: She had enough! (Part 5)

Fade in:

(Int. Jewelry place. Prue and Dood barges in and shoot everyone with their shotguns. Everyone dies except for Cole who was standing around looking pretty.)

PRUE: Cole!

COLE: Prue!

DOOD: Dood!

(Prue and Cole give him a look.)

DOOD: Just wanted to feel included.

PRUE: Cole, what are you doing here? And why do you have an engagement ring on your hand?

(Roll credits. Fade in: Police station holding room. Piper and Darryl are cuffed. Andy is nowhere to be seen. Sheridan walks up to Piper.)

SHERIDAN: I finally got you. You guys are witches and you murdered your sisters!

PIPER: What are you talking about? Paris is the only one dead.

SHERIDAN: What about Prue? And Pepper? And Phobia?

PIPER: Prue's alive. Phobia wasn't really our sister, and Pepper… well, she's dead.

SHERIDAN: Enough! I got you now, Halliwell. There's no way you can get rid of me.

DARRYL: Dad!

(Zankou flames in. he conjures a fireball and throws it at Sheridan killing her.)

ZANKOU: You made the right choice, son.

PIPER: Son?

ZANKOU: As for you, Piper, I'll let you go for now since you're sister took the book from me. But I suggest you do something to make the cops stop going after you. Maybe fake your own death or something.

PIPER: Um… ok.

(Zankou and Darryl flame out.)

PIPER: Did we get our effects back?

ALEX: (Off screen) This is the season finale. We need to look cool!

PIPER: Well, then I better glamour before and scrammed.

(Piper turned into a sassy cop. Cut to: Manor. Paige was hanging out in the living room. Precious comes in with a serious look on her face.)

PAIGE: Is about time someone came here. (Noting her face.) What's wrong?

PRECIOUS: Is Patience.

PAIGE: Our sister/pop singer?

PRECIOUS: Yeah… she died. The police found her here.

PAIGE: So there's a killer in the house.

PRECIOUS: Probably one of us.

PAIGE: Well, we'll have to deal with it next season.

PRECIOU: Figures. Hell of a cliffhanger though.

PAIGE: Yeah.

(Prue and Cole walked in. Prue returns to her body.)

PRUE: What happened?

PAIGE: Oh don't pull the "I can't remember what I did" bit.

PRUE: Find, but I refuse to apologize.

PRECIOUS: (To Cole) How did you get her to comeback?

COLE: I told her I found her secret box.

PRECIOUS: Secret box?

COLE: I don't know what it is either, but now I want to know!

(The sounds of the police are heard all over the place. They all look out the window and see a bunch of police cars and shooters pointing at the house. A swat team is surrounding the house. Also there, many people who are curious or think there's some sort of rave going on.)

PRECIOUS: What the...?

PRUE: I think we're busted.

(A crazy hippie woman comes in from the solarium door.)

HIPPIE: I'm a witch too! We're sisters! I'm just like you!

PRUE: The fuck! Get out of my house!

(She TK's the hippie out. Piper rushes down the stairs.)

PIPER: Guys, I have a plan!

PAIGE: Where did you come from?

PIPER: I learn how to orb.

PRUE: That makes no sense.

PIPER: Well, I learn how to astral project or blink or shimmer, whatever got me here.

(Then the hippie woman comes back in with a shotgun.)

PIPER: This seems scarily familiar...

HIPPIE: Kill the bad witch!

(She shoots Prue. Everyone shrugs. Cole throws a fireball at her.)

PIPER: Anyway... let's fake our deaths!

PAIGE: What?

PIPER: Is the perfect solution. We get the demons and the cops off our tails.

PRECIOUS: How do you propose we do that?

(Piper takes out a potion.)

PIPER: This thing will blow the house up. All we need to do is orb before the big bam and presto we're presumed dead.

COLE: That could work. They all saw us in the house.

PRECIOUS: I'm in.

PRUE: (Barely alive.) Can... someone... get me... to a... hospital?

PAIGE: What about Leo? And Wyatt? And Chris? And Phoebe?

PIPER: Um... ok, so my plan has a few holes.

(The police throw a smoke bomb in the house.)

PIPER: But... we ran out of time!

(Piper throws the potion. Cut to outside the manor. A huge explosion occurs. And the Manor explodes into tiny pieces. Weirdly enough, the other houses didn't suffer any damage.)

FBI GUY: Well, their dead.

COP: Are you sure?

FBI GUY: No. But this season is over so why bother searching now?

(They both shrug. Cut to the underworld. Wyatt is in an altar being worshipped by dwarfs. He smiles that sweet diabolical smile. Leo the goat can be seen tied to a corner. Cut to the Kent farm. The meteor shower is still in full swing. Phoebe is randomly avoiding getting hit. The huge piece of meteor rock falls on the house and Phoebe stumbles when that happens.)

PHOEBE: My house!

(She realizes that she's not in Prescott Street. She walks to Jonathan's truck and drives to the town. Everything is burning by the aftermath of the shower. Lois is leaning on the ground watching in despair.)

PHOEBE: (Lively.) Hi Lois!

(Lois looks at Phoebe annoyed and ignores her. Phoebe keeps driving and stops where Lana is standing in front of what appears to be a black spaceship.)

PHOEBE: This season finale was amazing! Wait! Who's closing the door?

(She thinks and then gets a bright idea. She gets out of the truck and closes the door. Fade to black.)

End.

A/N: Be on the look out for Season The Two... coming soon... or Tusday


End file.
